Louder Than Yesterday Part.3

 In the fifth and sixth grade, I never really listened to any music. Maybe it would be one song every couple days on YouTube that my dad would play in the car, or something I got from the soundtrack of a movie or a video game I was playing. Of course, the part of me which was highly opinionated in terms of music taste lived on, however, there was a dearth of music to learn from and to survive off of. It was like I saw it as an occasional tool to ease my mind off things instead of a drug where even one day without it would drive me insane. I guess, it's the feeling you get from the songs you hold the closest to your heart that I need an overdosage of every other second that I never really longed for in that short period of time.

This was until June 14, 2020. I was twelve and a half years old, and randomly decided to sign in to a brand new Spotify account. And as one would expect, it changed my life. I was introduced to newer songs by the day, was able to access all of my all-time favourites and gradually developed a strong addiction to music.

Spotify was a vast world of unlocking new feelings, new cures for depression, new emotions to channel, new experiences, and new songs to shape my identity, as well as my outlook towards life.

I was gradually drawn to this whole idea of seeing music as a drug. Each song instilling a different set of feelings that would make me addicted. All of them having their own atmosphere, meaning, vibe, it was almost along the lines of having my own vinyl/CD collection. 

I was new to Spotify at the time. I had this old habit of simply taking every single song that I fancied into one massive playlist indiscriminate of the genre from which it was. Era-wise, id say at least 95% of my music is from the 1990s and 2000s. As time went on, I realized my playlist looked rather unbalanced. A 90s pop hit followed by an early 2000's punk rock song was a bewildering sight to behold. So, I evolved as a listener (again), and put different songs in different playlists to make my profile look more organized as a reflection of myself as a music afficionado.

Spotify was, and still is the score to the motion picture that is my life. Some songs were to reflect emotions like fury, mirth, and sorrow, while others were to appreciate the art of the lyrical and melodic aspects of each song. It became an absolute necessity, not just for the attainment of a certain feeling, but something to drag me out of the darkest, most psychologically rotten places life dragged me into. But, we'll talk about that in our next blog.